


Intrinsically Drawn and Irreversibly Changed

by Heartbreakmosh (PompousPickle)



Category: Pro Wrestling NOAH
Genre: Break Up, Developing Relationship, Drabble Collection, M/M, Many wrestlers mentioned, Past Hayato/Kenoh, Relationship Study
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-16 02:01:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 2,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29568600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PompousPickle/pseuds/Heartbreakmosh
Summary: KenOhara in retrospect, from A to Z
Relationships: Kenoh/Ohara Hajime
Comments: 9
Kudos: 6





	1. Arrhythmia

**Author's Note:**

> So I had, quite serendipitously, been working on this piece very casually when they announced Kenoh and Ohara's singles match for the 21st. It felt like a sign to actually buckle down so. Here we go.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> February 2014

Ohara rested his chin on Kenoh’s shoulder, looking over a shared restaurant menu, completely at home, their tag team only weeks old. He made himself at home wherever he went, Kenoh realized. Perhaps that’s how he had gotten by, how he survived.  Kenoh had no idea where his heart had been. If there were pieces scattered around the globe. If there was enough leftover to lend to Kenoh. Ohara moved from the menu and smiled gently, giving Kenoh space. 

“I’m ready when you are.” 

And Kenoh’s own scattered heart, still buried deep in the Tohoku mountainside, finally began to beat. 


	2. Babble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> March 8th 2014

Hajime couldn’t stop apologizing. He knew it was annoying, but Kenoh’s words were always so firm, so magnetic. When he told Hajime that it wasn’t his fault that they lost, he almost believed him. So Hajime apologized again and again, testing to see how many different answers he could get before Kenoh finally snapped. 

Kenoh kissed him on the forehead instead. 

Kenoh pulled back, blinking over and over as though processing his own response, as though it were automatic. And he muttered his own apology, uncharacteristically unsure of himself. Hajime laughed, and reassured him with a kiss of his own. 


	3. Conditioning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> May 2014

Kenoh’s fingers gently rested on his nose, hand hiding his laugh, lowering his chin from the world. Hajime thought that wouldn’t do at all, so he practically climbed into Kenoh’s lap and brushed his hand away, cupping his face and pulling him in. Kenoh’s lips were small, but Ohara could still feel him smile against his mouth. He could feel his cheeks rise against his thumbs, humming pleasantly. And for the first time, Ohara thought that maybe he had something he could give to this team. That he could maybe change Kenoh in the way that Kenoh had changed him. 


	4. Definitions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> August 2014

“Alright. Which one of these bastards do you want to fight the most?” Kenoh asked casually, playing back tape of both Harada and Sabre Jr. 

“You, actually.” Hajime laughed, heart in his throat. Kenoh wasn’t in the title picture. Not yet. Hajime slid his hand into Kenoh’s and squeezed their intertwined fingers, a silent promise to give him a shot if he won the upcoming three-way. “After all, we’re rivals, right?” 

Kenoh’s expression was unreadable, as though sorting through every possible definition for their relationship. Every definition they had yet to arrive upon. 

Then Kenoh smiled, and Hajime’s heart sang. 


	5. Expectant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> September 2014

The kendo stick had been the Don’s idea. Kenoh had taken many things from Morishima, and he knew Ohara had as well. Like how when you say something important, you should always say it twice. Both had gotten the lecture. Both had taken it to heart. 

So when Hajime said “I think I love you”, Kenoh waited for him to say it again. It had been during a match, a quick, breathy thing, after Kenoh cut down Ishimori with that very kendo stick. But a follow-up never came, even after Hajime got the win. 

Kenoh swore it didn’t bother him. 


	6. Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> October 12th 2014

After they won the junior tag belts, Morishima took them out to drink and reflect upon the future. And as the night went on, Hajime indeed reflected. He decided that the future couldn’t be simple stolen kisses and interlocked fingers. He needed more, and Kenoh was never one to let himself be satisfied with less. 

So when Bach-san noted the time, Ohara slid his hand up Kenoh’s thigh. When Morishima suggested they get going, Ohara pressed his lips to Kenoh’s ear. “Take me home?” 

And their future wrote itself out immediately, Kenoh inhaling like he had forgotten how to breathe. 


	7. Gold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> January 2016

Kenoh watched Hajime carefully as he paced around the backstage, fingers dancing against his phone, trying to occupy himself. “Relax. It’s the third defense. Those fuckers don’t stand a chance.”  Arrogance was an easy trap to fall into, even easier with a man like Ohara by his side. 

“I know. I just…” Ohara looked up at Kenoh for the first time since they left the locker room, eyes earnest and glistening. “We’re doing your birthday dinner tonight. I don’t...I don’t want to ruin it.” 

Kenoh grabbed him by the shoulders and kissed him, and thought maybe he already won. 


	8. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> March 15 2015

“Oy. I’m staying tonight.” 

Ice melted as whiskey poured into a pair of glasses, Kenoh at the bottle. He slid one glass over to Hajime and the other man stared at it in his hand. It would be easy to leave now, before the damage of Suzuki-gun became irreversible. He had no contract. He could leave. Go back to Mexico, take Kenoh with him. 

“We'll get those belts back.” Kenoh pressed himself against Hajime. “The bastards in the crowd need us to. This is our home.” 

Hajime shuddered, submitting to the warmth of the whiskey. 

_ Right. This is our home.  _


	9. Imbue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> March 28 2015

They signed their contracts at the same time, but Kenoh couldn’t have felt further away from Hajime Ohara than he had at that moment. Hajime was laying down roots. He was rediscovering his passion. He was home. Kenoh felt miles away from that, like his home was still in the mountains. Like he could never catch up. 

He closed his eyes and thought of Jinsei.

_ I gave you the name Kenoh. Now take that name and make something from it.  _

When he opened his eyes, Ohara was smiling at him. Still far away, but Kenoh suddenly wanted to chase him. 


	10. Juxtaposed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> May 2015

Kenoh and Hajime didn’t listen to the same music when they worked out, and that suited Kenoh fine. They’d work separately, lose themselves to their own rhythm, and only come back together when they needed to. It was methodical, even utilitarian. It suited Kenoh. 

But sometimes he’d catch Ohara between sets, feet dancing around the rack with ease, lips mouthing along to some saccharine tune. Kenoh would come over, lean over the bar, and ask for a listen. Hajime would always grin and offer over one earbud. And Kenoh wouldn’t even hide his smile, tapping his foot to the beat. 


	11. Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> June 14 2015

Kenoh finally told Hajime about Hayato the night before the M-Pro show. Hajime only smiled, a touch sad it had taken so long. He had known, of course. He had watched their matches. He had heard people talk. He knew what Kenoh looked like when he saw something he desperately needed. He gave Kenoh his blessing to go anyway, hands shaking. 

Kenoh kissed him before he got into his car, a silent promise to return. Hajime wondered if he had ever given Hayato the same kiss, years before. He wondered if Hayato believed it, like Hajime so badly wanted to. 


	12. Linger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 23 2015

“I love you.” Kenoh nuzzled his head into Hajime’s hair. The other man was too dazed to respond, dizzy from the ragou. Dizzy from the lights of the ring. Dizzy from the crowd screaming Ohara’s name, even though he lost. Kenoh knew the loss would bother him. They were rivals, after all. That was their label. Their code. 

But still, Kenoh hoisted Hajime up, determined to show him the power he had over the crowd. Over everyone he touched. He leaned in one more time. 

“I truly, truly love you.” 

It was important, so he had to say it twice. 


	13. Morishima

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 24 2015- all units disbanded to fight Suzuki-gun

Hajime had expected Kenoh to be angrier after the press-conference. Marufuji had never sat well with him. He expected him to get drunk. To call Kitamiya to rant. To pick a fight with Ishimori. Anything, really. Anything that felt like  _ Kenoh _ to him. 

Instead he just laid on his bed, gently tracing lines across Hajime’s face, across his body. In total silence. In total darkness. 

“We can’t even finish the Don’s contract as a family now.” His voice was too soft. His face looked too young. 

“We’re still family,” Hajime tried, but his voice was watery, his words uncertain, heavy. 


	14. Narrative

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> March 2016

Harada and Kotoge were destined for destruction. Kenoh had decided that before he and Hajime took their belts back. Daisuke’s ambitions were cold, forged in the fight. Kotoge’s were warm, forged in the cheers of the crowd. It could never end well.

On the other hand, Hajime’s ambitions met Kenoh’s perfectly. They needed to make something out of this company. To make it worth hanging onto. They needed the belts to do that. And if their ambitions ever changed, Kenoh would leave. He wouldn’t let them rot, staring at each other, trying to find something that was no longer there. 


	15. Overindulgence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> April 2016

“Sorry. I’m not...I’m not usually like this,” Hajime mouthed against Kenoh’s throat, unable to tear himself away, not caring if anyone saw them. “What are you doing to me…?” He mumbled, eyes fluttering shut, rolling his hips, raw with hedonism. 

Kenoh shattered like glass, just from knowing he had that power over Hajime. Knowing he could reduce someone to such neediness. Knowing that he set Ohara free. 

He grabbed Hajime to drag him out of the venue, desperate to get to a cab, heedless of Hajime smiling behind him, chuckling at how easily Kenoh always fell to his whims. 


	16. Peripheral

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> August 2016

Jinsei had once told Kenoh that it was crucial to create a rival. 

Kenoh always did, wherever he went, and success came with it. People  _ wanted  _ to see tense rivalries. People wanted to see heroes overcome villains. But Kenoh knew Harada and Kotoge wouldn’t be enough forever. Attendance was slipping, beyond their team’s control. There would need to be new rivalries. There would need to be new dreams. There would need to be new villains. Things would need to be destroyed to be rebuilt. He glanced over at Ohara, sleeping against the bus window. 

_ Not yet.  _ Kenoh lingered.  _ Not yet.  _


	17. Questioning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> October 2016

Ohara sometimes felt less like Kenoh’s partner and more like a pet project. That was his own fault, really. His own obsession with magic tales and fantasies. His own idea of Kenoh as some kind of fairy godmother gone terribly wrong. But he couldn’t help but wonder what would happen when Hajime finally got the confidence to win the belt. He wondered if Kenoh would stop singing his praises. If he'd stop forcing him into the spotlight. If he’d deem the magic spell a success and leave Hajime alone at the ball, glass slipper in hand, dissolving back into rags. 


	18. Restless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 23 2016

On December 23rd, Kenoh woke up in Hajime's bed, and with dull horror he realized he was content to stay there forever. Skip the show, stay under the covers, and leave NOAH to disintegrate in the rumble that Suzuki-gun had left. And with it, the name Jinsei gave him would fade away, turning back to obscurity as he laid in the bed he had made with Hajime. And he knew he couldn't do that. 

"Oy. Wake up. We've got a match today," he finally mumbled into Hajime's sunkissed skin. All at once kissing him good morning and kissing him goodbye.


	19. Separation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> January 7 2017

Hajime caught a glimpse of Kenoh halfway through the match, peeking through the curtain, arms crossed and eyes narrowed. It should have distracted Ohara. But it only made him stronger. It only made him want that belt more. The belt that Kotoge vacated, the belt that had been abandoned and forgotten, like a mere afterthought in another man’s story. His submissions felt a little tighter after that, his shouts a little more raw. 

When he took the belt into his arms, he glanced at the curtain one last time, only to find it also abandoned. And Hajime finally let go. 


	20. Triumph

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> February 14 2017

When the two met in the ring again, they pushed their belts against each other. Kenoh was tag champion, finally fighting without restraint. And Ohara held the belt that Kenoh never could, finally free. Finally worthy. The metal scraped against each other gently, for only the two of them to hear. A whisper of celebration, just before the bell rang, congratulating them on fighting for their own sake. To tell them that they made the right choice. 

When Kenoh won, he laid the junior belt over Ohara like a blanket. And Ohara grabbed onto it, eyes slammed shut, but smiling.


	21. Unchanging

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> November 3 2017

They had won their one-night return, and Hajime almost kissed Kenoh afterwards. Not because he wanted to, but out of habit. He had felt it in the ring, the gravity of their old lives pulling them inwards. He could tell Kenoh felt it too, falling back into old habits despite his need to move forward. Gently grabbing Hajime’s arms, whispering in Hajime’s ear. And once, grabbing for Haime’s waist. But then he pulled his hand away, and it fell on his mouth, fingers on his nose, suppressing his smile, and Hajime realized there were things he could never fully change. 


	22. Viewpoint

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> March 11 2018

The rumors that Kenoh was leaving once his contract expired didn't surprise Hajime. Kenoh was unhappy, constantly blaming the company. But it didn't sit right with him. It didn't add up. It didn't feel like  _ Kenoh _ . So he asked, after Sugiura took the belt, and Kenoh looked genuinely offended by the question. "And throw away everything we've worked hard for? Are you fucking kidding me?"

Hajime let out a breath he didn't know he was holding, more reassured than he had been in months. They had signed those contracts together, after all. This was still their home, apart or together. 


	23. Work

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 16 2018

Kenoh had more important things to worry about than the Junior tag titles. The heavyweights were a better place for him. It was a place that let him put in work, a place that let him build and destroy, like he always wanted. Still, he watched sometimes. He liked to watch Ohara smile. He liked the way he and Kumano fought and celebrated together. He liked the way the crowd had cheered for them, like Ohara had truly earned it. And he would leave before he was noticed, satisfied that Hajime was putting in his end of the work too.


	24. Xenodochy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 2019

Years ago, to create a new scenery for Michinoku Pro, Kenoh created a faction. He gave them Buddhist roots. He dressed them in red. But back then, each member was only chosen to create villains to fight the heroes. Kenoh never took a vested interest in them. He never gave them a place to grow, a place to thrive outside the company’s pull. He never loved Asura. Not the way he loved Kongoh. Not the way he had learned to love and support others. Not the way Hajime had taught him, had given him. And for that, he was thankful. 


	25. Yielding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 3 2020

Perhaps it was cruel to leave Kotoge with Harada. Perhaps a piece of Hajime had wanted leadership that badly. Perhaps a piece of him resented that he didn’t take it in the first place. So when Kotoge rescued Harada, he couldn’t help but remember their rivalry, back then, and he thought about what Kenoh would do. 

He realized that Kenoh would take what he truly wanted. So Ohara did. And when they fought for leadership again, there was no way in his mind that he could lose. He smiled at Yo-Hey and Seiki, and wondered if Kenoh was secretly proud. 


	26. Zenith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> February 21 2021

The match didn’t go the way either of them had wanted, but in the end that suited them fine. Their stories needed to continue. Hajime with his new family by his side. Kenoh with a new challenger at his back. They would continue to meet, in these little corners of the countryside, pushing against each other, intrinsically drawn and irreversibly changed. 

And just as Kenoh got his win, just before he was attacked, just before their next stories began, Hajime thought he heard a whisper. He thought he heard a “Thank you. Really, thank you.” Twice. Like it was important. 


End file.
